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I am a hot mess express going full throttle

Tuesday, December 28, 2010

Croc Not

I'm sorry, but this post has been a long time coming.  I know I am probably about to offend a good many of the general population that just so happens to read my non sense ramblings.  But I just have to get this off of my chest.  CROCS.  I do not understand how people love them so much.  When did wearing rubber clogs become cool.  I truly do not understand the attraction.  Now-I do understand kids wearing them.  They are easy and no hassle.  That's fine.  I even know a lady who wears them all the time.  And she is super cool.  She is the only exception to my anti crocs rule bc they are cute on her.  It's the men that I don't understand.  They love them.  I just don't get it.  Please keep in mind that this is solely my opinion.  I took the liberty of Googleing "Crocs."  It just so happens that Urban Dictionary had some definitions pop up:

1-quite possibly the ugliest but most comfortable shoes ever. everyone wears them from babies to old farts and rich kids to poorish kids. they are very heinous looking. (this was my personal favorite)


2-the most ridiculous markup since bottled water.
bottled water puts a fraction of a penny worth of water in a 2 cent bottle and sell it for a buck. crocs, on the other hand mold a few cents of plastic with no water inside into something kinda resembling a shoe, then sell the damn thing for $30.

3-Hidious but revolutionary shoes made of Croslite polyurethane—an antimicrobial resin that (contrary to anecdotal evidence) resists odor. The clasic clog is made several colors with and without holes and with and without straps. More and more styles(even boots) are about to hit the market. Ugly is comfortable.


I am sorry, I just hate Crocs. There. I said it.  If I could erase any fashion trends, I would wipeout Crocs and Rompers.  I tried not to let the Crocs get to me, but yesterday I was in Dick's Sporting Goods and eavesropped on a horrific scene/dialogue.  I was casually browsing around the guns and bullets section (typical).  When I saw what looked to be a 60ish yr old man and a 40ish yr old man.  I think they were related.
60ish yr old:  (he was wearing camo crocs) Do you like your new crocs?
40ish yr old (he was wearing some new style as seen above) Yes. I do.  I have about 5 pair of Crocs.  But these are nice ones. I can wear them to church, or weddings and stuff.  They look really nice. They look nicer than my regular dress shoes.
*Here is where I was about to spontaneously combust.  Weddings?!?!?  What the heck.  If I see crocs at my wedding.  It's over.  Crocs have gone too far. 
60ish yr old: Do you think they have some here?  I could get a few pairs.  I have a gift card. 
40ish yr old:  I bet they do.  Now they have ones with corduroy.  Those are really nice.  I have worn them to work a few times.

I had to walk away.  I was about to inform them that Crocs were in fact not cool.  Especially to wear to a wedding.  I take that back.  If you are Joe Dirt, then fine.  You can wear them to a wedding.  Who would have thought that men would love wearing plastic/rubbery clogs??  I'm sorry, but look:

 






So there you have it.  I am sorry if I have offended you, but I have to speak the truth.  Or at least, my opinion.  I know you didn't ask for it, but your reading it.  On my blog.  Free game.
Not rockin Crocs,
SRS

3 comments:

  1. I'm super offended Sass. I own two pairs of crocs. The navy blue pair, only to be worn within the premises of our yard/house, are UGLY--I know! But I do like my brown ones! Guess I'll have to banish them from my wardrobe!!

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  2. Hunter got the camo, fleece-lined ones for Christmas & loves them. I'm with you - UGLY!

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  3. Awesome post! I have a theory that TOMS are the new crocs. Fadlicious!

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