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I am a hot mess express going full throttle

Tuesday, September 24, 2013

Clear Eyes Full Hearts

Per usual, I was talking with a friend today.  Some days, I have a lot of thoughts.  When I say a lot, you really have no idea what you are dealing with.  Rain Man.  Luckily this friend is in for the long haul and has amazing listening capacity.  So I was in the midst of processing/blabbing.  And a thought popped into my head.  (This is the problem- sometimes they come out of no where, un invited, and come right on in.)  Today was full of them.  Any way.  Proverbs 4:23, the guard your heart one.  This one keeps coming back to me.  So I think I'm going to pay attention to it.  I kept pushing it away, because frankly, I may be too good at guarding that thing.  It's a steel trap.  I like to keep it close.  Sometimes probably too close.  Fortunately/unfortunately I've not lent it to anyone.  It's ok.  It's important.  But, I think about my heart a lot.  Spiritually it is HUGE piece of the framework.  We are called to love and I don't want to be loving with a tainted heart.  I want to love people/God with all of my heart.  I pray that I would be kind hearted.  Good hearted.  Whole hearted.  Scripture (you can fact check me if need be, but I've checked) says it is where life starts (The Message).  So I totally get the whole guard your heart from the world, from people, from hurtful things etc. Don't throw your pearls to swine etc.

Here is something I thought about today.  We live in a fallen world.  I'm a sinner.  Even though I keep my heart close, I've let things into my heart that the Lord never intended to be there.  Hurtful things, hard things.  Things known and unknown.  We all have our junk.  There are things that I would love to cut right on out.  But sometimes I get stuck.  Sometimes I like to skip over some of the bad because I don't want to man up and deal.  Because it can be hard and let me be frank- it can hurt like hell.  (Maybe you do this sometimes?? please say yes.. so I'm on a 1 woman hot mess express..) There are things that I have let barge right on it and set up camp.  Hurt feelings, resentment, bitterness & disappointment.  But, I've also let in the good.  Love, trust, friendship, faithfulness, grief (the good kind).  Things that have grown my heart.  Today I realized that while guarding my heart, I may also be guarding it from letting those hard things out.  I wonder how cool it would be to trash the junk and guard a whole heart??  I want to have a heart of God.  I want to love people like God loves.  It's hard, but I think it's what he ultimately wants.  He wants us to be more Christ like.  That's having the eyes of God, the ears of God and the heart of God. 

So that's where I am today.  And whether you know it or not, maybe that's where you are.  So here is what I will do.  Starting today, I pray that you and I both would know the heart of God more and more each day.  I pray that He would (gently) show us some things that he would like to take from our hearts.  The things not of Him.  Things we have believed about our selves or each other that are not of Him.  I pray that He would help us to be more like Him.  I pray that we would love Him whole heartedly.  That we would love each other with the heart of God.  And that we would fully know the heart of God and that we could wrap our heads and our hearts around just how much we are loved.  Keep in mind- this is a struggle of mine.  But, I want to guard a clean heart.  And I want you to as well.  When I do let people in my heart, I want to let them into the heart of God.

In the words of my all time favorites,
Clear eyes, Full hearts,
SRS

Read Proverbs 4:23:)

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