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I am a hot mess express going full throttle

Tuesday, November 5, 2013

Is it worth it?

I've been thinking about a whole mess of things lately.  Sorry for the blog absence, but I've been meaning to collect my thoughts on many things and haven't had a real sense of what to write.  But, today, sitting in my office, I got a tid bit of inspiration. 

Last week we said goodbye to a sweet, sweet boy.  A lot of my favorite memories with the Dotts include Michael Reese.  I don't know if I can recall a time of not seeing a smile on his face.  I feel like we have been dealing a lot more with loss lately.  Especially this year.  The low country has said goodbye to some of the best and most loved people.  And it has been hard.  Hard to watch.  Hard to experience.  And especially hard to watch other people experience.  But, I learned something at Michael's funeral.  The message was on love and grief.  At first I was immediately not a fan of this topic, but then something hit me.  He said (this is paraphrased a bit), if we choose to love greatly, we will lose greatly.  We will grieve the losses of loves.  At first I thought this sounded absolutely horrible.  But, then after a few days it kept coming back.  We can choose to play it safe, not risk too much and keep to our selves.  Sounds pretty safe.  Not a lot to lose.  But, if we choose that, then we aren't choosing to live.  To really live.  To really live as we are called is to love.  And if we choose to really love, then we are taking a risk.  A huge risk.  We risk our hearts.  Vulnerability at it's core.  In my personal/very non professional opinion- it is more than worth the risk.  We have the chance to love people.  To have relationships that encourage us.  Relationships that make us feel worthy.  To be able to share that with others is so cool.  The hardest part about loving well though, is when we lose those that we love.  There is no way to describe it.  It is the most horrible feeling ever. I wish it upon no one.  But, I keep coming back to what the preacher said.  We can love greatly.  We can change lives.  Just by loving.  With loving greatly does come losing, but I can't imagine not taking the risk.  Not fully living and not fully loving.  We have such an amazing chance.  A chance to love people.  When they are awesome and when they are not so awesome.  At their best and at their worst.  Why?  Because someone loved us first when we least deserved it.  Love on.  Love well.

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