So good. Gah.

http://www.npr.org/event/music/155910915/kcrw-presents-ben-howard?autoplay=true

Going Deep

Tonight we are going deep.  Eject now if you want to get off of this ride.

Lately I've been feeling a little complacent slash bored slash tired slash lazy slash doubtful slash uncertain in the spiritual side of things.  Don't panic.  I'm just putting it out there.  Yes, things are good. Yes, there are some things that need to be worked on.  I find that I go through waves or seasons in my walk.  Some times you may catch me and I am on fire, other times I can be like a wet sponge.  And then all of the in between.  Before I went on my wild west adventure, my friend Sherri gave me some books written by some wizards and I was supposed to read them on my trip.  Well, that did not quite happen.  But, I read one last night- Better late than never.  The book is a 50 page treasure.  I'm going to have to memorize it.  I'm going to lay it down for you (in my own words).  Keep in mind- this may not apply to you or interest you in the least, but it doesn't hurt to hear it....

Obviously we all have times or seasons where God's presence is really tangible.  We see Him, hear Him, know Him and feel Him in supernatural ways.  Smart people call this manifestation.  It's a time of blessing.  I love this time.  It's way easier than the next one.   Then we have those times where it seems that he's hidden.  Or that he's not there.  When this happens I automatically assume it's me.  I've done something wrong or I don't know how to see Him or hear Him.  Then it's just a downward spiral.  You kind of feel like you are on your own.  That's when I go into "walk it off mode" and hope for the best...  Smart people like to call this hiddenness.  It's actually not all bad my friends. It's supposedly a time of building.  Here is where the smart people blew my mind.  During hiddenness (not my favorite time period), God is still there.  He teaches us by hiding himself.  It teaches us to live differently.  We can't rely solely on experience.  We have to go to a deeper level.  The visible is removed so that we can operate by faith, not sight.  It teaches us to trust.  It also teaches us to rely on the Lord.

This is is the part I don't like.  Because I'm not so good at trusting.  I'm also not up to par on relying solely on the Lord.  To me it's like a trust grab bag.  There are so many things that I give to the Lord and trust completely, but then there's a few pieces that I can't seem to let go of and feel like I have to do it on my own.  I'm just not sure how to go about it.  And then you throw in the whole relying thing and this Ole ship is sinking.  How do we get to that place of trusting fully and relying solely on the Lord??  (Let me know)

Here is another cool thing.  How many times do we go through an event or bad experience and not until we are on the other side do we realize God was there?  This is called Retrospective Revelation.  That's all fine and dandy, but I want to live in option 2.  Progressive Revelation.  Trusting that He is with us, visible or not.  Wouldn't that be cool?  They also say that before we even come close to opening our minds or processing an event, we should come to a place of worship.  (Yes please)  This is a place of being in God's presence.  Trust and Faith.  Until we learn to live from the Spirit, we are stuck processing life from the soul, mind, emotions and will.  Oh snap.

Last night, I was overwhelmed reading this tiny little midget of a book.  So much good stuff in such a tiny book.  I felt so dumb, because I always assume God's not near when I feel the hiddenness.  It's so cool to think that He is.  Not only is He there, but he's teaching us through it.  I mean, I'm totally game for that.

It's just something to think about.  The book is called Hiddenness and Manifestation by Graham Cooke.  I would go ahead and get that sucker.  Memorize it, love it, live it.  Boom.

Stay classy.

Office Diaries of the woman appraiser

I like my job. For the most part.  However, I do find it funny that I come across weird, wacko, crazy, abnormal people. On a very frequent basis.  (Please refer to my off the reservation post if you need a traumatizing example)  Today I went and inspected a house and came out ever so grateful for many reasons.  Most of all- Thankful that I don't have 6 kids under 6.  Yes, you had done read right.  Kids everywhere.  I was losing control and I didn't even have to birth them.  And I love kids.  These were just out of control.  Crying, wanting food, wanting to be held, needing to go to the bathroom, asking 1 million questions.  Plus she was homeschooling them.  I would have to send mine to 1 year old kindergarten.  I just felt awful for the baby momma.  I mean, I think she was my age even. I saw no escape for her.    As I slammed the door behind me, I felt like I was leaving a wounded soldier behind.  Trapped in the house with the little people.  Better her than me.  I still have a life to live. FREEDOM!  So today I am thankful to not be responsible for six other little tiny people.  Amen. 

Welcome to September my friends.  It's my birth month.  Things are gonna get cray cray.

Make good choices,
SRS

Time.

I feel like this little word comes up a lot.  Free time, no time, you name it.  I also feel like no matter what season you find your self in, you have to manage it.  It's inevitable.  Most of my life I was a fly by the seat of my pants kind of girl.  Now that I have actual responsibilities, I try to manage some of it.  I was recently discussing this with some friends and it's the same thing every time.  We all struggle with time management, fitting it all in and doing it all.  (Every time this comes up I want to kick myself, because I always find myself in the same situation.  BUSY)  I used to be incredibly guilty at fitting it all in.  Instead of saying yes to one thing and no to others, I would say yes to everything and would try to do it all.  I was all over the place.  Well, that didn't last too long.  I've been really trying to be intentional with my time.  I want to be 100% wherever I am.  I want to be intentional to who I am with or what I am doing.  It's hard though because there are so many great things to do, yet there's just not quite enough time to get it all in.  So, one of my goals this year is to be intentional with things that I do.  I think that automatically makes one intentional in relationships and mindful to what's going on.  I always have to remember that we can't be it all and we can't do it all.  I also want to be intentional with myself.  I want to have the time to go in the boat, fish, write, read and play guitar.  Me time.  So you can all hold me to that....

Peace out.

Hotness & Guns

Yesterday was opening day for dove hunting.  It was also the hottest that I have ever been in my life.  And it was awesome.  I truly like hunting for one reason.  You basically have to get out of town and you have to be outside.  Glory be.  Now I like dove hunting because you can do what you want, you don't have to wear fancy hunting attire and you can yell at people from wherever you are...  I went with Tim Wink, Carson and Rocky to Marion ( a very large booming metropolis in the boone docks of our state).  I was a little nervous, being the only girl and all, but I think I pulled it off.  I shot a double, dropped some birds, met a cute DNR officer, got my first ticket ever, sweated buckets and had a great time.  Wouldn't have traded it for anything.  Hope there's more where that came from.

The madres

Every Friday I get to meet with a purdy cool lil amoeba of ladies.  I like to call them "The Mom Friends.".  Hope that's not offensive.  We meet bright and early (They have probably been up for hours) on Friday mornings.  I remember when Lisa (the Dr. mom friend) asked me to join.  I was rather perplexed when she asked me.  Several reasons here.  1- the obvious.  I'm 26.  Single.  No blood related ninos.  I was a little nervous due to the fact that I have significantly less life experience.  And that I haven't delivered any offspring.  2-they are smart.  I mean , they are.  No explanation needed.  I kinda feel smart after hanging with them.  It's a contagious thing.  3- Spiritually, I am like a little tadpole and I would have to say that they are more like a big tarpon... Sorry, bad analogy, but you can smell what I'm stepping in.  4- this was the most random group that I ever could have imagined.  Apparently they go back. I didn't know that.  I have just been laughing to myself because I probably would have never stumbled upon this pile of good Ole girls on my own.  I was thinking about that this morning.  When we were sitting there, talking about our selves and just being real, I kept thinking how cool it is that we are all really different, yet we can relate to the same situation.  Yeah, I work full time and volunteer to too many things and have no free time.  They have a zillion kidlets, volunteer, etc and have no time. (Plus they have to deal with a husband).  I just think its really cool that we can all bond, and share and talk about stuff.  I've always felt myself in that little time.  Plus, its always fun to hang out with people that you don't normally see.  They are all really cool in there own ways too.  I mean, I hope if I ever have to be a mom that I am like them.  They are really intentional about their kids and I think that's really cool.  (Now I have lots of cool mom friends and a cool mom, so nobody out there take offense.  I love you all 100%. At the same time:)  So, here's to the Mom Friends.  You the bomb.

Heavy on the Veggie?

Disclaimer: Claire, I am not writing this post to try and get free stuff.  However, who doesn't want,need, love somewhat like free stuff.  I am writing this post because you are beating me into submission teaching me a lot.

So, my friend, Claire, has a blog.  It's called Heavy on the Veggie.  You can have your world rocked learn all about it HERE.  Home girl knows what she's talking about.  I have already learned so much.  Keep in mind, I am a beginner.  Baby steps I tell her.  I'm more heavy on the veggie with a dollop of meat.  I've been reading veggie literature, listening to her advice and she's even gone to the store with me.  It's actually quite fun.  Once you realize that you are breaking up with your favorite bacon cheeseburger, fries and your favorite big gulp beer, its all rainbows and butterflies...  It's a process.  No need to go cold turkey right here and now.  Here deal- is not some big diet.  It's your life.  You want to be leaner?  Eat greener.  I'm about to trademark that shiz.  Now, I'm just beginning, but it's been very educational.  I have to text her questions almost on a daily basis.  She's so lucky:)  It's a tough transition to go from 100% carnivore to plant lover.  I'd be pretty happy with 75% plants and 20% meat and maybe 5% good beer...  I know- beer is going to have to love me and leave me, but I'm just not ready yet.  We have already moved mountains here. I no longer get my beloved Godfather sandwich at Mozzo.  Nope.  I go with a girly fusion or salad.  Hold the phones.  The Mozzo people seriously don't know what to do with themselves.  Now every time I'm anywhere there's food, I am constantly weighing the pros and cons.  I had no idea how many veggies we were supposed to get everyday.  I only ate them if they came on a sandwich or if they were sweet potato fries...  Don't judge... She also does restaurant reviews.  I like this part because she usually reviews a place that I either have never heard of or was too scared to go to.  Some of them are intimidating little places.  Now I know what to expect.  You can also find some recipes on there.   Thanks to HOTV I can now make a smoothie.  Like I said, baby steps.  What's even better is that I am 20% scared of Claire (even though I could totes taker her down:), so I try even harder.  So I thought I would throw it out there.  It's 2k12, and I am going for it.  Heavy on the Veggie here I come.  Slowly, but surely....   Who's in???

Sincerely,
meat lover